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Fear of Love

Your face smiling from a diagram of lives,
I look at you,
I don’t feel nothing,
useless lust lost in the fog of this week,
Christmas lights flickering in the new twilight.
Time slows down now,
memories that give me nausea,
a face like yours.

Yours.
Y
o
URS. US. U. S. My shield.

Another voice.
Silence.
Beat.
Refusal.
Stay away.
No pleasure.
And I’m afraid of love,
My walls are high around me,
they will defend my bleeding heart.

A touch that hurts,
tears dried as we tore apart,
words written in a chemical madness,
your will to touch me.
Closure. Stay away from me.
Don’t make this shiny armor explode. *
I *
——————————————————— * * * *
Explosion.
And if you want to skim over my soul,
please do that gently,
then lay me down and disappear,
give me the best memory,
I won’t never cry for you,
but I will fly away.
No love lost,
It still feels hard.

And I remember once upon a time,
wasting lovers every night,
bored at heart,
needing tenderness on the surface,
I would have waited for you;
and if you think of me once in a while,
I will keep our dearest memories in my heart.

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